A Contemplative Stance Helps Us Move at the Speed of Soul

12/15/20

Dear friend,

It was a year ago October when the phrase move at the speed of soul came into my life.

I had just returned from my first residency with a contemplative leadership program hosted by the Shalem Institute on a farm in Pennsylvania. My husband, Kirk, and I spent four days with a cohort of 14 souls who were committing to journey together for 18 months, seeking to bring a posture of contemplative leadership to our work.

We moved slowly through the hours of the day. We shared meals, laughter, and tears. We enjoyed the brisk air and the wintering light of the outdoors.

And then we returned home by way of airports and freeways to the push and pull of "normal" life.

But it didn't feel normal. It felt rushed. It felt harried. It carried the feel of a panic.

I wrote on Instagram during the week following the retreat:

What would it look like to move at the speed of soul? After a week away at a retreat that brought with it many gifts and much clarity, I feel like I moved through this week with nothing more than a foggy mind.

I couldn’t focus. Clarity of thought eluded me. Every empty block of time on my calendar led to my sitting on the couch with a scrunched look on my face, wondering: What am I trying to get done right now? What was my priority, again?

I just had a conversation with Kirk that led to my being reminded of the soul versus ego. My ego was upset with my (lack of) progress on clear priorities this week. My ego wanted me to hurry up. My ego was getting stressed out that I hadn’t yet communicated the fruits of my retreat to many people yet, that I hadn’t yet created a clear plan for moving forward on what’s emerged.

The soul needs a clearing, Kirk reminded me. This return home has been a return to the dense forest of life, where distractions and demands that may or may not be mine to hold have greeted me with their loud noises.

The soul needs space to speak.

So I went to sit in the clearing with my soul. I felt I owed it my apology.

Then the invitation presented itself: Move at the speed of soul. What would that look like? How would choosing to live that way affect how I live each day? Am I willing to do it?

I feel willing. I’m going to see how it goes, saying yes to the speed and needs of my soul above all else.

The push-pull of the reality around us and inside our very selves is one of soul versus ego—or, as we've come to call it in the Light House, spirit versus empire.

The tentacles of empire and ego shackle us, slithering up and around us with a subtle yet brazen, possessive force. They suffocate and seek to snuff the divine spark of life found in us, around us, and in all we do.

It takes focused intention and practice to return to the place of soul. It takes commitment to move at the speed of soul, to tell the world of empire and our own ego that we will not be dominated by those demands but will be drawn forth at the pace for which our souls were made.

It's a pace that gives us eyes to see and ears to hear what's true, what matters, what endures, and what's being invited of us. It gives us the ability to live well and purposefully. It helps us love others around us better, seeing them and their lives with greater clarity and presence.

Our contemplative stance makes this possible. I pray you continue to find it and live it well.

Yours at the speed of soul,
Christianne